: What to do when your Children Reject you after Divorce
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(401 Words)
Few events are as devastating as your children rejecting you after divorce. Sometimes it seems as if nothing you do can get through to your children. The following steps may help guide you through this time.
Take care of yourself
First you might want to give yourself a little TLC. Do not let yourself become overcome by guilt. Despite what your children say or how they act, a divorce is something between two adults. If you were unhappy in a marriage, then it is okay that you took this step. Do not just believe everything negative thing that your children say about you. Chances are that they are very confused, and they likely do not mean half of what they say. If you feel overwhelmed by their rejection then try techniques to make yourself feel better. Read self-help books or even seek the services of a counselor if you think that it would help.
Give them time
Sometimes a rift between children and the parent can be repaired as time passes. As your children grow older, they may be less emotional about the divorce and more reasonable. They may want to have a better relationship with you. They may take a more adult view, and they may even seek to repair the relationship themselves. If you just keep pushing and pushing and pushing, then sometimes it will have the opposite effect. They may just shy away from all of your attempts. That isn’t to say that you should just walk away, but just be careful in how aggressive you want to be.
Talk with them
You may want to have a talk with your children. Explain that you want to have a better relationship with them. You do not need to go into the details of the divorce. Also, do not just insult the other parent because they might get defensive. You can ask what you can do to make it better. If your children will not talk to you, then you can consider writing them a letter.
Do thoughtful things
Your child may start to warm up to you if you are thoughtful with them. Stay interested in them. Get them thoughtful gifts and remember important occasions.
The most important thing to remember is not to give up. No matter what, there is always a chance that the rift can be mended. Be strong and you will make it through.