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It can be very difficult to deal with the situation when your ex’s new boyfriend or girlfriend interferes with custody and visitation issues. There are different steps that you can take to deal with these, and you may want to take it more seriously if lighter methods do not work.
Talk to your ex
If the relegated custody and visitation times are not being honored by your ex because of his or her new significant other, then the first thing you might want to do is talk to them (as long as you have some level of dialogue between the two of you). Discuss the situation and of course talk about how your visitation time is very important to you. You can talk about the difficulties of planning your time, and how challenging it is when the times are not done according to the agreement.
When you are talking you might want to leave the ex’s new significant other out of the discussion. You do not want him or her to think that you are jealous of them (even if you are). You do not want them to think that you are trying to punish him or her because of the new relationship. Keep it solely about the kids.
You can also see if you can mutually come up with a new custody or visitation agreement that would work for both of you. Now that he or she has someone else they may want different times, and if that is fine with you as long as it is consistent, then you might want to consider making the change. You can decide if you want a formal change put in the custody and visitation agreement or if you just want to do it between yourselves.
Take further action
In some cases, you cannot talk to your ex. Perhaps you did try to talk to them and they said it would stop but it hasn’t. Perhaps they just declined to do anything at all. Their boyfriend or girlfriend just keeps getting involved. Then you might have to do further measures through the court. If your ex has the kids when it is your time, you do have the legal right to have them and you can take that up through the authorities. You can also talk to your lawyer, and he or she might send your ex a letter. Of course, you can also take them back to court, where the judge can evaluate the situation and impose sanctions on your ex depending on the situation.
Just because your ex has a new boyfriend or girlfriend does not mean that you can’t see your kids as you are supposed to. Be sure to be logical and rational in dealing with the situation.
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